Asian Junkie I-Team: Solving the mystery of Taeyeon’s boobs

Two years ago, AKF writer Zaku brought to everyone’s attention that something weird was happening with SNSD’s Taeyeon’s cleavage, causing the outrage of SONEs. Recently, KPOPALYPSE revived the urban legend behind OreoLover89’s bra.

The problem, of course, is that nobody appears to have solved this mystery and thus it persists to this day, which is where the Asian Junkie I-Team comes into play.

taeyeon-boobs

The other attempts to solve this mystery had one fatal flaw: they were both done by dudes likely more interested in staring at her tits than doing REAL WORK. But after 15 years of doing my EXHAUSTIVE investigative journalistic duty, I have scored a victory for women everywhere and solved the puzzle to the seemingly endless black chasm in Taeyeon’s chest.

No need to say goodbye to loved ones, worrying Taeyeon had a black hole weapon to herself. No need to send boob spelunkers down what might’ve been an endless column to certain death. No need to dedicate conspiracy theories to this any longer. I got this.

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This first picture is just to point out that Taeyeon is indeed wearing a black bra. It’s important to establish this as it will be the basis for future analysis.

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While these two commenters might have a point, further observation into the realm of Taeyeon’s chest can easily disprove this theory.

taeyeon-boobs3

As we can see clearly in this screenshot, unless Taeng’s boob is a membrane folding on itself, it’s hard to explain what’s going on in there.

No, the answer seems to be a much simpler one:

invisible-bra-silicone-inserts-bra-inserts

While these silicone pads for bras usually go inside the bras, it appears that the one she was wearing that day didn’t have the compartment to do so.

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Bingo. Done. I win.

This would’ve been figured out long ago if pervert dudes had to worry about making their titties bigger on a daily basis.

Science’d the shit out of boobs. I’m done for the day.

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If you happen to find a K-pop mystery you want to see solved, just contact me at hyunasnostrils@monkeybutt.com.

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