The ‘Bon Bon Olympic‘ recently aired with its star-studded cast of girl group members, but because of copyright or whatever, everybody else’s clips of the show were being taken down. Thus, due to everybody else’s worthlessness, I had to watch the whole damn thing and make clips myself.
I am the best.
To start shit off, under the pretense of being interviewed or some shit, the idols instead have a bunch of fake cockroaches thrown at them to determine who has the best horror face.
Nara wins gold, Kyungri gets silver, and Jimin ended up with bronze, but I’d give the overall reaction award to Nayeon, who looked horrified by the prospect of touching the fake cockroach AFTER she already knew it was fake.
Then there was a sexy dance competition, which was actually an excuse to weigh the idols and see who was most honest (and for sexy dances).
Hani won gold, Cao Lu got silver, and Jimin scored bronze, but really what it enforced is that Hani has lost too much goddamn weight.
Besides, at the end of the day, who was the real winner of this competition? Park Boram, that’s who.
Without a doubt, Park Boram trying to be sexy is the greatest accomplishment in human history.
The idols then all got judged by their weird individual talents, but it was actually about their partner’s reactions.
Hyeyeon ended up winning gold, Hani got silver, and Youngji managed bronze, but really Cao Lu’s Donald Duck impression did it for me.
The clinching factor for the medals was Hyeyeon almost blowing out her ACL.
Seriously though, that brief moment Hyeyeon tilted left while adjusting the guy on her back made me cringe cause she was a slight movement away from caving in her knee stability.
To cap it all off, the girls basically got trolled by the staff while having a can stacking competition. The winners were the ones who had the brightest reactions to the staff fucking up their can towers instead of having bitch faces or whatever.
Yezi, Hani, and Solji ended up having the bitchiest faces, which means they were the actual winners. The nicest reactions went to Jimin for gold, Cao Lu for silver, and Lizzy for bronze.
Out of all the idols in attendance, the motherfuckin’ top madam won the overall honors and got to not starve to death as a reward.