‘Unpretty Rapstar’ episode 6 has an upset & eliminations + Jessi goes the fuck off

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Unpretty Rapstar‘ episode six was a fucking doozy, huh? Two eliminations, “teamwork” after they just had two rap battle blowouts, and a surprising unsurprising track upset.

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First and foremost, where we left off last week, which was the battle for the track.

Cheetah Vs. Jimin

I’ll say this: this was a lot closer than their actual skill level indicates. Jimin was prepared and Cheetah wasn’t as good as when she demolished Yuk Ji Dam and Jimin in that three-way battle.

That said, I still thought Cheetah was better. Like Cheetah said, there seems to be an idol grading scale, where expectations are low so anything above that is a bonus. Most compliments Jimin receives are: 1) stage performance 2) professionalism 3) some version of ‘wow, didn’t expect that’. Getting put over like this isn’t helping Jimin out at all with anybody other than people who were already a fan and were gonna be even if she bombed out completely on this show. That’s reality.

I said this before, but if the show would just let her go out on her own without pushing a narrative or being biased, she would’ve gained respect just for holding her own, improving her craft, and doing better than expected. Maybe she wouldn’t have won a track or whatever, but she could’ve changed some perspectives of her and marked the starting point for her rapping. But as it stands, while her fans act like she’s the idol underdog or something, nobody is hating on her seriously on the show, and from the first episode she was already winning shit. Like literally on the first episode she beat Cheetah with her chorus in a cypher (a chorus … cypher). Thus, people are going to naturally question it and be unhappy with the results. Hard to blame them.

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Anyway, next they decided on a teamwork battle for a fucking individual rap competition … and the worst team would be eliminated … which is incredibly stupid, but I assume it was an attempt to create drama.

Jessi & Yuk Ji Dam

I honestly didn’t think they were that good to be ranked #1. A typical Jessi performance with a lot of swearing and working the crowd and little of substance. Yuk Ji Dam being encouraged to become more like Jessi is honestly the worst thing she could do.

Also, I almost threw up with the Notorious B.I.G. and Tupac Shakur comment.

That said, they were entertaining, which counts for something.

Jimin & Kisum

They did an idol performance and made the judges dicks hard, basically. Genius when you think about it, though stupid when you think about what the show is supposed to be for. But they played the game and it got them the #2 spot.

Cheetah & Jolly V

Cheetah was Cheetah.

I honestly have no idea if Cheetah signed off on Jolly V doing all that shit or if Jolly V was just excited or what, but she basically almost got Cheetah eliminated from the show (which is hilarious). She was awkward and doing shit like throwing crumpled bills and hopping around. I also have no idea where her flow goes when she has to rap over a beat, as she just mashes words together and slurs or something, but it was good enough to net #3.

Tymee & Jace

Tymee and Jace were eliminated, as you likely know by now. And that’s when it got interesting.

Anyway, Tymee broke out Napper — her quick-firing, aggressive, deeper-voiced alter ego from years ago. And oh look, it was great. Uh, at least she got motivated to take it seriously in the last few episodes and got to show her stuff a bit.

Unfortunately, Jace was the hyperactive squirrel again and made shit just weird. Plus, her delivery is disturbingly bad and it didn’t seem like she had any rhythm at all. Thus, it came down to Jace being sort of worse than Jolly V and Tymee being easier to eliminate than Cheetah (getting rid of far and away the best rapper not the best look, no?).

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And that’s when Jessi literally made Kisum and Jimin go home early.

Look at this fucking face compilation:

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Anyway, she then basically called out San E, saying this is all fucked up, and so San E asked who should go home and she said Jimin and Kisum.

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After it was final, Kisum and Jimin beelined for the stage to stay bye and then left the building while everybody else stuck around and Jessi was still ranting to Cheetah and Jolly V.

I don’t necessarily blame the duo for splitting though, because Jessi is liable to slam faces into glass windows.

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So yeah.

The drama is back!

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– It looks like the final two episodes will be some live stage type format with audience voting, which sets up well for Jessi, Cheetah, and … Jimin.

To be clear, bias isn’t just WINNING audience votes, it’s also getting more votes than you deserve.

– Is this how some people hold their writing instruments?

FailWriting

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